The Column
Motto: Let’s Get It Started In Here
Our baby is going to be induced two days from now. Tomorrow we go in for pre-induction medical magic. That means basically everything I do right now I’m doing for the last time as an individual without any children. This is the last Column I will write as a non-father. This is the last time I’ll write the word “ambidextrous”. This is the last time I’ll go on a nice little Sunday outing. It makes everything seem arbitrarily important. Every thought is good enough to write about. Every little thing is worthy of savor. That’s probably why I’m on a hot streak of Column writing.
Next time I write something in here, I’ll have to start each of my opinions with “As a father…”
Melissa says I should proof read these Columns before I actually post them. She’s noticed a number of times where I start somet
It’s amazing how much the weather affects everything and everybody. If it’s a nice day I am almost invariably in a good mood. Everything seems right in the world. There’s no problem that’s too serious and no issue that’s difficult to overcome. People are nicer. The world seems to be created by some divine & all-powerful creator that loves us. I look at herbs growing in the garden and think about how wonderful it is this little complex life form has grown just so that it can be enjoyed and grown anew. It’s designed and tailored to enrich the human experience. A slightly overcast, a bit of breeze, mid-70’s day has the capability to really put me into a good mood. I wonder if you’d still get that feeling if you lived in a place where it’s nice all the time. Do people in California just walk around all day with a positive outlook? Do people in Hawaii think that life is a beautiful gift?
Right here right now it’s muggy as hell. Everything sucks.
Nah it’s alright. But I do wish I could walk out my front door and go on a hike. I wish I could swim in the ocean… nevermind the fact I suck at swimming. I think I’d have a good reason to learn competence if my only experience with the water wasn’t 6’ deep pools and a trip to the lake every now and then. But it’s garbage outside 8 months out of the year. So you take up hobbies like drawing, coding, reading, watching movies, or lifting weights. If life gives you lemons, you make lemonade… despite the fact you’d probably prefer a nice strawberry smoothie or something. Just be grateful you’ve got lemons in the first place.
I’m a farmer sitting on his porch watching a storm roll in… it looks like a doozy, but we’ve been needing rain anyway.
Top 5: Alternative Names That We ALSO Didn’t Choose
5. Higgs Boson Gillespie
4. Bill Self Himself Gillespie
3. Groot Gillespie
2. Silverback The Gorillaman
1. Joob Saack Gillespie
Quote:
“Table for 2.999”
- Me, because as a soon-to-be-father you’re legally obligated to make that joke the day before your kid comes -