The Column
Motto: My health? It’s gone viral.
I fell ill Monday night. At 8pm on Monday I decided I needed to go to bed because I was tired. Then I realized I was freezing. Then I realized I was sore everywhere. Then I swore silently to myself.
I had caught the flu. Or a virus. Or something.
Here’s the timeline: 8pm, Monday - 8pm, Tuesday: Never left bed. Not to pee. Not at all. 8pm, Tuesday - 8am Wednesday: Used restroom. Refilled my water bottle. Moved from bed to couch because bed was COVERED in broken fever sweat. 8am, Wednesday - 8pm Wednesday: Forced a shower. Tried to work some, huge mistake. Fell back asleep for a few hours. Woke up again COVERED in broken fever sweat. Watched some Community. 8pm Wednesday - 8am Thursday: Ate some Greek Yogurt and a Clif bar - first food in >36 hours. Took meds for the first time (more on that in a second). Woke up, finally feeling most of the way better.
About the meds: Why did I wait so long to take them? The answer is that I experienced one or two delusional thoughts while I was down. One was that I didn’t have any pills because they were all at my parent’s house (which is not accurate) - the other was that I was leaving for Thailand today (literally today), instead of in 3 weeks. I believed both of those things so fully that I tried making phone calls. The phone didn’t work, though. The touch screen wouldn’t respond. I still don’t know why - could be because it was also covered in sweat (capacitive touchscreens don’t work so well when covered with a conductive substance) or it could be for some other reason that my 100+ degree brain couldn’t comprehend. Either way, I successfully made neither of those calls.
I got a flu shot - yet I still got the flu. I’m pretty sure there’s a lawsuit in there somewhere.
It was probably a virus, though.
Today is Pi day, 3.14. Today’s date combined with the arbitrary way we line up dates in America bear a striking resemblance to the first 3 digits of the ratio of a circles circumference to its diameter.
In high school, a couple of friends and I memorized Pi out to 50 something digits. This wasn’t done out of pure boredom. It wasn’t done with planning and forethought. One day, Josh found Pi written in a book as “3.14159”. He remembered those extra three digits until the next morning when we saw each other again.
“Hey dude, did you know the next 3 digits of Pi are ‘159’?”
I did not. But I made a mental note to Google it, see if he was wrong, and memorize an additional digit on top of him.
He wasn’t wrong. I memorized ‘2’ - it actually should be a ‘3’ with rounding, but I decided not to trifle with such frivolities. The next day in school -
“Hey, Josh, did you know the next digit of Pi is a 2? 3.141592”.
And it was on.
Over the next month, we came into school each day having memorized another 2 to 4 additional digits of Pi. We made it just past the point I can remember to today:
3.141592653589793238462643383279502884197169399
You might be thinking “Aaron, any idiot can copy and paste something from the internet” - and you have every right to question me. But, if you do doubt, I ask you to write those 46 characters and ask me what they are the next time you see me.
Actually, since I like the number 47, I’m going to WORK on remembering that the next digit is a 3. Or maybe I’ll remember 3751 and make it an even 50.
Here’s the only picture I’ve taken since the last update to this one.
AJ refused to pose because he was “busy” with his “driving”.
Top 5: Good things about having the flu 5. . 4. . 3. If you WANTED to lose weight, it would be helpful. I haven’t weighed myself, but I’m betting I lost 3 to 5 pounds temporarily 2. .
- I will have forcibly cleaned sheets thanks to all the sweat
Yes, I left off 5,4, and 2 on purpose. The flu sucks… and every time I write it I write “flue” and feel stupid. So it double-sucks.
Quote:
“(Your) second-a-day video is starting to cause me to tear up… Thought you should know” Krista, she’s the second person to say something like this about the video, it’s oddly flattering
“My insurance is going to be $134 and that’s the kind of car you kill yourself in” Josh