#41 - Forum Snobs and the Google Kool-Aid

3 minute read

Motto: Sub Sandwiches are so named because they are the same basic shape as a submarine.

The motto was something completely obvious that I didn’t realize until just earlier today. That blew my mind with its obviousness.

It has been brought to my attention that I don’t speak much of world events or general news outside of my realm of immediate interests. So, I’m going to try a brief Fourier (editor’s note from 2020: Foray. This is a well-educated idiot’s typo) into the broader news:

Obama won the election. Alright, now that that’s over I can go back to talking about what I had planned.

I hate forum snobs. I don’t like the word “hate” and try to use it as little as possible, so as to maintain its strong meaning, but it’s warranted in this situation. When I Google a problem I’m having, and I find a post where someone has the same problem as me on some obscure forum, there is a 50% chance my search will end with a forum snob than a real answer. Let me define Forum Snob to give you a better idea what I mean: Forum SnobNoun – Person who cares more about the rules and bylaws of a forum than the content of said forum or any discussion therein. Characterized by a refusal to answer questions because “This question has already been asked before”, often accompanied by a snarky remark along the lines of “The ‘search button’ is right up there, use it”, “this isn’t the proper forum for this question”, or a more generic “you broke rule number (whatever)”. Just answer the question or let someone else do it. Shut up. You and your forum rules can go straight to hell.

In other news, I realized recently I have invested about as heavily into Google as any one person can invest. I use:

  • Gmail
  • Google Calendar
  • Google Drive
  • Google Music
  • Google Search
  • Google Maps
  • Google Reader
  • Google+
  • Google Talk
  • Google Hangouts (in my eyes, Hangouts are their own thing, separate from Google+)
  • Google Wallet
  • Google Tasks
  • Google Chrome
  • The most pure Google Android phone possible
  • The most pure Google Android tablet available
  • (Google) Picasa Photo Manager
  • Google Currents
  • I’m writing in a (Google) Blogger Blog
  • I have my own (Google) YouTube page.
  • I own several products from the Google Store
  • Soon, I will get my internet (and maybe television) straight from Google with the installation of Google Fiber directly into my place.

The only POSSIBLE way I could be more invested into Google:

  • Using a ChromeOS computer instead of a Windows one (which honestly could change soon enough, my computer is about 3 steps away from dead right now).
  • Using Google Docs instead of Microsoft Office (I use each of them now, I can’t give up Excel and my Macros. I am too deeply in love. It’s what’s holding me back from a ChromeOS device.
  • Getting Google TV (which I’ve honestly looked into on multiple occasions)

You could say I’m a Googler. Alternatively, you could say I drank the Google Kool-Aid. I consider myself a purist. I’m going to end this post with a pair of Top 5’s that have nothing to do with anything I’ve talked about above.

Top 5: Ways in which I am manly, in a traditional sense

  1. I have shot many guns in my day. I am interested in shooting more in the future.
  2. I like mathematics and the sciences
  3. I like building things, be they physical or computerized.
  4. I like steak, action movies, and Family Guy.
  5. I am technologically minded, I know how to hook up a home entertainment system and how to manage all of my technological equipment.

Bonus 2nd Top 5: Ways in which I am unmanly, in a traditional sense

  1. I sometimes sit cross-legged when nobody is around.
  2. I don’t like breaking the rules. It makes me uncomfortable.
  3. I don’t care about cars, trucks, motorcycles, or any other mode of transportation, per say.
  4. I hate being dirty. I hate having a dirty place.
  5. I couldn’t care less about professional sports. The only sport I have the faintest glimmer of stake in is Men’s college basketball


“You should just work for Google” Danielle, Priya, Lia, Melissa, Josh, Jon, and many others… your move, Google